I think that it’s a safe bet to say that no one is born romantic and that it’s a skill that anyone can master if the person is committed to the learning process.

Do you know of someone who seems to naturally have the magic touch when it comes to making romantic gestures and is always approached by others for advice on how they could do the same?

Usually, the reason this person is so good at being a romantic is that he or she practiced a lot over the years, and has learned what motivates people.

The biggest key to being successful in the romantic department is finding out what your partner wants, not what they need, and then finding unique ways to meet those wants.

Sounds pretty simple, right?

Let me get one thing cleared up first…

Being romantic isn’t about some grand extravagant gesture like flying first class to Paris for a 2-week romantic blitz, which there’s nothing wrong with.

It’s all about the little things.

The Little Things are the simple gestures that you do for your loved one.

Despite the fact that they are little, can mean a lot because it illustrates that you took the time out of your busy schedule just to show them how much you care.

One thing that most people want, male and female, is to feel special and loved. It’s how you show them, is where the challenge presents itself.

There are three main ways people prefer to be shown you love them.

  • Some people feel loved when they are told repeatedly that they are loved.
  • Others feel loved when they are touched frequently.
  • And others see love in gestures and everyday kindnesses.

Of course, there are others that may need all three of the above to really feel loved and secure, but usually, there is one need that dominates.

You need to find out what your partner needs and then you can begin working out what method you will use to romance them.

Not sure what your loved one prefers?

Simply, do an experiment or three to see how your partner responds, and you’ll very quickly be able to determine.

Experiment 1

What can you do if your loved one wants to hear how much you love them? You need to tell them.

But don’t just tell them and have it coming off like some kind of rote response to hello or goodbye or please pass the pepper.

Think about different ways you can get your message across.

You could:

1) Write a good old-fashioned love letter.

2) Send a romantic email.

3) Text a love message.

4) Place a love note somewhere it will be found easily, in their car or lunch bag or under their pillow, or taped to the phone receiver or their computer.

5) For the kid in all of us! Use multi-colored, sidewalk chalk to draw a BIG heart in red and write “I love you" in the middle of the heart. Do this someplace prominent like your driveway so that when your partner comes home they will see it right away.

6) Make a long list of the many reasons why you love your partner and have the list framed and present it to him or her.

7) If you don’t live together, call your loved one just to say goodnight and recite a favorite love poem over the phone.

8) Give your loved one a compliment, about how great they look or what their smile does to you.

Experiment 2

If your significant other needs regular physical contact to feel loved you can:

9) Give a massage – backs and feet at the end of a workweek are always well received!

10) Keep in physical contact as often as you can, for example, when watching TV together, or eating dinner (it doesn’t just have to be handholding, you can make sure your feet or legs are touching).

11) Give random hugs.

12) Put your arm around your loved one in public to show your affection.

13) Hold hands as you walk side-by-side.

14) Cuddle up in your PJs and watch a romantic movie together.

15) Make sure you kiss when you get home and kiss before you leave.

Experiment 3

If your actions speak louder than words for your significant other, then you’ll want to focus on gestures that express your feelings.

You can try:

16) While your partner showers, heat up his or her towel in the dryer.

17) Have flowers delivered to your partner’s workplace.

18) Surprise your partner by arriving home with their favorite drink, snack, or ice- cream.

19) Arrange for an intimate lunch date with your partner. Then afterward, send a virtual card to tell him or her how much you enjoyed lunch together.

20) Call your partner in the middle of the day to discuss your romantic plans for that evening.

21) Write your own love coupon offering an hour of your time as your personal love mate.

22) Cook a favorite meal for your partner and then eat it, slowly, by candlelight.

23) Pick a bouquet of wildflowers and present them with a kiss.

24) Call spontaneously at their work to say “I am thinking of you.”

I recommend that you make note of how your partner responds to each romantic gesture in order to keep track.

This will allow you to see at at-a-glance what he or she likes or don’t like,

This is beneficial because you can continue repeating the gestures that have a positive impact and disregard those he or she doesn’t care for.

Paying attention to those details can gain you some major points!


Doing these three experiments will quickly allow you to determine how your significant other prefers you to show him or her love.

Here they are to refresh your memory...

1)) Some people feel loved when they are told repeatedly that they are loved.

2)) Others feel loved when they are touched frequently.

3)) And others see love in gestures and everyday kindnesses.

Of course, your partner may like gestures from each of the three experiments, but the only way to tell which dominates is by tracking and referring to the notes of how he or she responds to each.

Don’t complement this process, because even if you’re not able to clearly determine how your partner prefers you to show love, he or she will still appreciate your heartfelt efforts to be romantic.

And that alone will help you accomplish your goal of being a smooth operator in the eyes of your significant other.

Heck, your partner will be so pleased with the romantic gestures that he or she may brag to his or her friends about you.

That would make you feel good about your efforts and yourself.

If your partner likes all of the above, then you can really go wild and mix it all up together. The only limit is your own imagination and the desire to make it happen.

If you don’t want the romantic flame to burn out in your relationship, then you must do everything within your power to fan those flames so that they continue to shine bright.

The lack of romance could kill a relationship, and now you have 24 ways that you can begin using right away.

Have fun on your romantic journey!

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